Android “Q” – 17 Desserts down, 9 to go

Dear Google,

It was a nifty idea…. I wonder if you really believed Android would be as successful as it has become, or that you would potentially make it thru the entire alphabet? So what are you going to do in another nine releases?

Might I suggest a rather nifty and educational proposal? One that will provide you with over a hundred versions. One might even say this idea is elemental…



Karen Covy – you are wrong on so many levels.

“Equal Parenting” means exactly what it says.  Two parents share parenting rights, responsibilities, and time with their kids 50/50.

“Research also shows that conflict hurts children.”
REBUTTAL: The periods of highest conflict and distress in regards to divorced children and two parents, are the periods of transition.  Equal 50/50 parenting allows a simple transition to happen once a week – that is 52 transitions a year.

Compare that to the present standard often allocated to fathers of every other weekend and one night weekly of visitation.
26 x weekend pickup
26 x weekend drop off
52 x mid-week visitation pickup
52 x mid-week visitation dropoff
TOTAL 156 transitions vs a mere 52 in an equal parenting arrangement, that is 3x the number of distressing transitions.

1. They establish a legal presumption of 50/50 parenting time.

“A legal presumption strips judges of discretion and requires them to “presume” that something is true. without any proof that it is true.”

In no way is a judge stripped of their discretion. The presumption simply mandates that a) the starting point for evaluating a custody case starts from an equal position b) that if a judge decides there are grounds not to award 50/50 equally shared custody, than the judge must be able to substantiate the reasons why they feel justified to take away a child’s right to have both parents in their lives equally.

“regardless of the facts and circumstances of their case.”

Completely untrue.  However, the facts and circumstances must be documentable and substantiated. Presently, this is not the case.  If one parent is an adept liar, they can simply make claim after claim with no requirement to provide any supporting evidence to substantiate the claim. Whom the judge believes becomes the winner – regardless of truth, facts, or the safety and well-being of the child(ren).  The presumption mandates that a judge can actually substantiate why they decided to believe one party over the other, what evidence led them to see a concern, and to mandate both from parents but also custody evaluators, etc. that any claims be substantiated.

2. They change the burden of proof.

“a preponderance of the evidence” versus “clear and convincing”

Why this change is necessary, because in family court a “preponderance of evidence” is often just “he said” or “she said”, and the judge believes them (be it because they’re younger, more attractive, a woman, etc., etc.) and routinely clear and documentable evidence is ignored in decisions.

However, since the burden of proof is set merely at a “preponderance of evidence” there is little ability to question a judge’s decision since the judge simply felt one individual to be more believable than the other, that can be deemed sufficient (despite that one individual favored by the judge repeatedly making false statements while the one disbelieved by the judge could of spoken honestly).

3. They change WHAT a parent has to prove in order to deviate from strict 50/50 parenting time.

As they should.  Imagine if we went back to the old patriarchy standard of custody, prior to changes enacted as women became more empowered politically and gained the right to vote. Fathers always received custody of the child, as they were deemed his heirs.

Currently, fathers almost automatically loses access to their children. Despite any concerns regarding the well being and safety of children in their mother’s care.  Fathers who are hard working, drug alcohol free, with no criminal records still lose to mothers who are engaged in drug use and criminal activities and repeatedly investigated by CPS.

How is that a system benefiting or protecting the well being of a child’s physical, mental, moral or emotional health?

“That is significantly different than requiring a parent to prove that having more or less parenting time is best for their kids.”

Why should I as an amazing dad have to prove that I have a right to be in my children’s lives or that my children have a right to have their dad equally in their life.  Reverse this, and you would decry the horrors of what fathers are subjected to continuously.

4. They require written court opinions.

The horrors, they actually require the judge to write an opinion justifiying his or her decision.  I mean, parents are forced in the court system (often by one selfish parent).

And to demand that after a father has spent $25,000 or more trying to be involved in his child(ren)’s lives, to expect a judge to actually write a few paragraphs justifying why they removed a father from a child’s life seems hardly a complaint.  Oh, and without that written opinion, it can be very hard to pursue an appeal. What was said? Did a court recorder record the opinion? How do you even get a copy.  Seriously, if the court cannot provide a father a written record of why it is taking him away from his children, than that court does not merit continued operation.


5 Ways the Proposed Parenting Laws Will Hurt Kids

1. The new laws put the parents’ “rights” above their children’s best interests.

No, the new law recognizes that it is a child’s right and in their best interest to have access to both parents on a regular basis. And that a parent’s gender is not the determining factor.

“What do children of divorce want? While the answer obviously differs from case to case, most kids just want to be kids.”

Funny you should ask that, because ALL my kids want their daddy in their lives a lot lot more.  All my kids want at least a return to the 50/50 equal custody we once had.  And if you want the truth, most kids want both mommy and daddy.  Sadly, in these cases that is NOT possible. So the next best choice (outside of any extenuating circumstances) is that the kids get parents 50% of the time.  ANYTHING ELSE, unless there are extenuating circumstances of abuse, etc. is a decision made against the children’s best interests, and usually against their desires.

2. The new laws endanger children in cases involving domestic violence, abuse, and neglect.

No they do not, any substantiated abuse or violence still has as much merit as it ever did. However, what it does is not allow is a wife who never had any claims of such abuse prior to suddenly after a divorce has begun (often because she’s chosen to be with another man) to suddenly claim and insinuate abuse without any evidence or substantiation. No accordance from any of the children.  And then under pressure to protect victims, enable the use of the courts to forcibly expel fathers from their homes, use restraining orders to prevent fathers from coming near their children – despite never having harmed their children.

At worst, it requires some sort of evidence to be provided. A record, history, child statement or testimony. ANYTHING….any single shred of evidence, regardless of how small.

At best, good fathers who have never abused their children or their spouses won’t have the courts utilized as a tool against them without cause. (The irony here is the presumption that fathers are the only danger to children despite many statistics that show abuse of children often is more common under mothers.)

3. Parenting research does not support the new laws.

“Depending on the study, “shared” parenting time can be anything from 25- 50% of time. Those studies simply don’t support the proposition that 50/50 parenting time is really best for the kids in all cases.”

First, the reason for the lack of in depth statistics on just 50/50 parenting time is due to the fact that the systemic bias of the family courts are so strong that there just are not a lot of 50/50 parenting time schedules.  The vast majority of schedules equate to mother automatically receives primary custody, father  is relegated to 2 weekends a month.

Nothing in the new laws prohibit appropriate parenting plans to be formulated. Nor do they say that accommodations cannot be enacted for newborn infants.  Rather, just that a case must be made and justified.

4. The proposed parenting laws will primarily be used by the people who are the least equipped to fight them.

“According to most experts, at least 90% of all divorce cases settle out of court.”
Why? Because most fathers are informed (and rightly so) that despite them being a superb and amazing father, that the mere fact they are male almost ensures that they will not be awarded even shared custody.
Do you spend $25,000 trying to stay in your children’s lives only to have nothing to share for it a year later. And if you do not have $25,000…then what? It is very hard for working parents to engage in a custody process “pro se”.

“The 10% or so that go to trial are the most difficult, highest conflict, cases.”
Often, only one party is difficult and high conflict. And they are seeking to use the court system as a way to destroy their ex-spouse and take everything they can away.

“Amicably divorcing people do not need an equal parenting law.”
True, but there are very few amicable divorcing people.  And it should be noted that BOTH need to agree to be amiacable, if only one chooses not to be, than it becomes contentious.

A presumptive 50/50 custody law would eliminate many cases that are brought to court merely for vindictive reasons. It will prevent one spouse viewing the court system as a way to take away everything from their former spouse (children, home, earnings, etc).

“As everyone knows, litigation is expensive. Fighting your divorce case in court can cost tens, or hundreds, of thousands of dollars. Yet, the only way to challenge the proposed equal time requirement if your spouse won’t agree to a different schedule, is by fighting in court.”

And what do you think one must do today?  No different…except presently, it is often based solely on gender.

5. The proposed parenting laws will dramatically affect child support.

OMG, both parents will be obligated to work and/or take care of their children. The horrors.

“While adjusting child support based upon time spent with a child seems fair, most men still earn more than most women.”
Most men work more hours, which is then used against them in custody court to justify taking them away from their children’s live.

Oh, and a little insight…EVERY state has laws and calculations that are designed to balance out any imbalances in income.  So even if a mother earns $25K/year and a father earns $50K/year, and are awarded 50/50 custody by presumptive default.  That does NOT mean that dad has twice the $$$ to raise the kids with then mom. Rather, the equations go thru and adjust the child support to balance out the income due the children.

What is seldom ever addressed is that if a mother chooses to not work or to work part-time in order to be with the children more, they will earn a reduced income, this then equates to the father a) losing custody due to working b) having to pay the mother more because she has chosen not to work.  Yet, even when it is the father who was the stay-at-home parent and the mother the bread winner.  Custody is still often given to the mother and the father suddenly obligated to get a job and begin paying child support.  Yes, this is about nothing but gender.

“Women therefore argue that if their support is reduced based upon parenting time, they won’t be able to make ends meet.”
Funny, you used the word women. Thank you for admitting this is really all about protecting a gender biased system that just happens to benefit women. One in which a man loses everything, the children he loves, the home he helped build, huge portion of his earnings, and then is held under the threat of incarceration and jail.

“Tying child support payments to parenting time causes many divorcing parents to put their kids in the middle of a financial tug-of-war.”

Funny, because presently, a father can pay child support and the mother can disregard court order after court order and refuse to let the father be in his children’s lives.  Yet, ironically, despite being in contempt of court, this behavior almost never garners jail time or even the threat of jail time.


The Proposed Equal Parenting Laws Are Not the Answer
“They will not put the children first in any situation.”

Ironically, they will put more children first than our current system. But perhaps you should talk to my children and get some insight.

“Right now, most laws don’t explicitly favor mothers in custody or parenting battles. But, as a practical matter, in many places there is a judicial bias in favor of keeping kids with their moms. That bias, as well-intentioned as it may be, is not helpful.”

And I think it is ironic, that in other areas, the solution of civil rights matters has been to pass legislation that protects equal rights.  Yet, here, you argue against such a protection. Meanwhile, children are left under abusive mothers, being abused, pimped out, even killed. While loving fathers don’t even have a chance at custody.

“How much time kids spend with each parent should be for the PARENTS to decide.”
Seriously? This is the dumbest line in your whole article. Firstly, it contradicts your whole argument above about being the child’s interests and not the parent’s interest.

Second, if both parents want the most amount of time with their children possible, than the only fair balance is 50%/50%. You’re arguing against codifying that for the very specific situations in which the parents cannot come to an agreement (because of either one or both parents).

Why should it not be for the children to decide?  The children get the least say. Were my children listened to, at the very least they would of have had 50/50 custody, if they had to choose one parent, it would of been daddy.

“The judge’s decision should be based on the best research, as well as the individual characteristics of each family. It should be based on gender neutral laws applied evenhandedly to all.”


“How can we really do what’s best for these kids?”

If you don’t think I have asked that question a bajillion times. You really do not understand this issue at all.

No, all the mass shooters are NOT Democrats/Republicans (yes, most are male…and there is a reason for that)

Recently saw a claim that all of the 2018 mass shootings had a link to the alt-right.  And in past years the claim has been made that most have had links to the left.

Often it is hard to determine, unless there are blatant outbursts, manifestos, etc. And often, it is those for which we have those, that we can easily identify.  Yet, oddly, these often disappear.  Their posts, tweets, facebook pages are taken down.  No determination made.  In regards to those under 18, they are too young to register to vote. But often there are patterns.  Democrat children often follow parents, likewise Republican.

For those older, I find it odd how nearly impossible it is to find voting registration records of shooters. (But perhaps that is because I believe that once you commit such a heinous crime, you give up all pretense to privacy rights of publicly held information.)

Here is a list of mass shootings. This corresponds to most of the red dot maps that circulate online. But if you read thru the list, you suddenly realize that 90% are gang shootings, bar fights, love triangles, etc.  Not what most are thinking of when we say a “mass shooting”.

To most of us, we mean a shooting in which hapless strangers are tragically targeted and/or murdered.  Either due to a political viewpoint or from a combination of isolation and mental illness.  I’ve tried to review most of those below.

There are some other relevant aspects related to the typical mass shooter. Many come from fatherless or broken homes.  And most endure significant isolation. This is a cause of concern that is often passed over, dismissed as a sex only “Incel” issue. If we are open to it, it may  in fact be one of the leading contributing factors.  Social issues affecting males in our society are routinely ignored. Often flat out dismissed on the grounds of privilege.  However, privilege in and of itself does not nullify legitimate issues of concern.

For example, the quantity of positive touch that the average American male receives is extremely low.  Many men goes days, weeks, even months without any significant affirming touch. (Let’s define significant as a “minimum” of 30 seconds of positive affirming platonic touch. A two second handshake or greeting hug does not count.)  Studies have shown that such isolation corresponds to increased incidents of violence.  Now, the comment retort is “toxic masculinity” is the problem. Perhaps it is a leading factor, but it is far from exclusive. Many males report that they do try to express their emotions, their struggles, their hardships. Societies response, both from men and women, is largely to silence, reject, ignore, or isolate the individual.  The more a man struggles in our society (be it an injury, illness, or series of unfortunate events), the more he finds that he has no friends, no supporters, and that he is now deemed ineligible to date.  Men are not allowed to reveal their struggle, not so much by toxic men, but rather by women.  It is often women who enact the harshest punishments toward men who reveal weakness or failure.

The result of this isolation, that so many wonder as to why it leads to this sort of violence. Or why are nearly ALL shooters “men”.   What role does this isolation play?

Imagine if you will, that you are in my shoes.  A divorced father, with three children whom you love very much.  You’re a devoted father.  A doting father.  But despite being in the top 1% of fathers, you still have had your children taken from you because you have a penis.  You spent tens of thousands of dollars just fighting to maintain a 50/50, every other week, custody. On top of losing access to most of your children’s lives.  Never getting to enjoy moments you spent years dreaming of…you also find yourself enslaved economically to your ex-spouse. Duplicity in the handling of the financial metric leaves you paying nearly double what the state says you should. You find yourself working 40 hours or more at a demanding job, commuting 2-3 hours a day, continually exhausted.  And what for?  You get but two weekends a month with your kids, and perhaps a few isolated visitation windows in the week.  Then what? What happens on that bit of free time you find yourself left with?  You seek out social engagement, comradery, friendship, romantic interest.  But it eludes you…

Most of the people you encounter are involved in relationships, dragging along a 3rd wheel rarely is popular.  Social engagements, well in your 40’s many of those involve the need for $$$ (which you have in very short supply).  Friendship and comradery…but you’re single. Okay, so go to singles focused activities.  Only to find that you’re ineligible. NO ONE, wants to date someone with all your baggage. An ongoing divorce (after 5 years), three children (which are your life, and whom you are NOT simply going to brush aside), and financial challenges despite having downsized your life to a mobile home and 15 year old vehicles.

The result?  It is not uncommon for me to go weeks or even months without ANY non-family touch.  Maybe I enjoy 2-3 nights a year in which I get to cuddle with someone, watch a movie, and spend the night in each others arms. And no, that’s not a euphemism for sex. I am talking platonic touch.

On top of all this, you are very aware that you have internal issues as well. You don’t find yourself abandoned from your marriage, your children largely taken away, and not have a broken heart.

You think, oh this is common…let me see what resources are out there to help.  This is where it gets really depressing, as you discover nearly no resources exist for you.  Almost every site is worded for women, none even recognize you as a victim of abuse.  Meanwhile, time passes….years pass.  You’ve worked on yourself. You still try to be upbeat while hiding all the stuff going on in the background of your life. Because you’ve realized those negative events have to be handled on your own. Exposing them will simply cause you to be further abandoned.  And you can already count on your hand how many people visited and hung out with you last year.

So what happens. Most of ones life in a cubicle at work. No one visits.  No on ever touches you. You post about just needing a friend to visit during a hard week, hang out, watch a movie, share a beer, laugh….no one comes.  They’re all too busy, often with others, most often with partners. One day, something really bad happens. You begin to write a suicide note.  But in the end it takes a turn and just becomes an expression of your pain. But it’s clear, very clear, just how close it was to one.  Three days later…the first comment by a friend appears “<3”

How long do you think a soul can exist in such a world?  How long until that man starts to feel like a spectre or ghost.  Just haunting his cubicle every day. Heck, I mistakenly came to work on MLK, the building was empty. It wasn’t much different from most any other day.  Eventually, these sorts of things in combination with zero physical touch start to establish a pattern in which the mind begins to dissassociate an understanding of the physical.  Without human touch, you might as well be playing some Sims game or “Cubicle 2.0”.  And it is much easier to shut off life, or shoot another life, when the mind has become so dissassociated from existence.  That there is little more interaction with humanity than NPC characters in the latest Playstation RPG.

Perhaps, beyond political leanings. We as a society need to take a strong hard look at the isolation we put our men thru, and how that isolation contributes to suicide, violence, toxic masculinity, and more.

I wager we would actually see far more progress if we addressed that than if we addressed politics, firearms, or mental health.

Once again…

Here is a list of 2018 mass shootings. I’ve tried to review most of the ones that fall outside of gang, bar, lover quarrels, etc.


11/7 Thousand Oaks shooting – Ian David Long, former marine, with recognized mental health issues. Possible PTSD.

[Right-wing label, Justified]
11/2 Tallahassee shooting – Scott Paul Beierle, former military veteran and former public school teacher. Also a documented sexual predator. Incel. Racist.

[Right-wing label, Justified]
10/27 Tree of Life Synagogue (Pittsburgh, PA) – Robert Gregory Bowers, white nationalist.

[Right-wing label, Justified]
10/24 Jeffersontown Kroger shooting – Gregory A. Bush, history of mental illness and domestic violance with his ex-wife who was black.  Paranoid-schizophrenic. Racist behaviors.

[Left-wing label, Justified]
9/20 Aberdeen, Maryland shooting – Snochia Moseley, a self-identified transgender African American woman who struggled with mental health issues.

[Unknown, more likely Left-aligned]
9/6 Cincinnati shooting – Omar Santa Perez, severe mental health issues. Paranoid.

[Unknown, more likely Left-aligned, or apolitical]
8/26 Jacksonville Landing (video game venue) – David Katz, a professional Madden player from Baltimore, Maryland. History of mental illness. Parents government employees at NASA and FDA (unlikely to be righ-leaning)

[Unlikely, more likely Left-wing aligned]
6/28 Capital Gazette shooting – Jarrod Ramos, history of mental health issues.

[Unlikely, more likely Left-wing aligned]
5/30 2018 Scottsdale spree – Dwight Lamon Jones, mental health issues, domestic violence record, divorce, custody issues at play.

[Left-wing label, Justified]
5/18 Sante Fe HS –  Dimitrios Pagourtzis, possible victim of repeated bullying.  Statments included “Hammer and Sickle=Rebellion”

[Right-wing label, Probable]
4/22 Nashville Waffle House – Travis Jeffrey Reinking, severe schizophrenia. Was found incompetent to stand trial and committed to a mental hospital for treatment. (Apparently was partly naked during the shooting.)  A prior report noted: “Travis is hostile toward police and does not recognize police authority. Travis also possesses several firearms.” [Now ask yourself why someone this delusional was allowed to continue possessing firearms????] Possibly a sovereign rights supporter. He was arrested by Secret Service in 2017 at the White House grounds trying to meet with President Trump. Claim of racist epitaphs used.]

[None, Personal/Relationship related]
3/9 Yountville Shooting – Albert Wong, Afghanistan Army vet. Was dimissed from residential treatment center.  Allowed most staff and veterans to exit. Held three clinicians, who were later killed by Wong.

[Right-wing label, Justified]
2/14 Stoneman Douglas HS – Nikolas Cruz, adopted, orphaned in 2017. Repeated school expulsions. Multiple recommendations for involuntary psychiatric care. Claims of anti-black/muslim rhetoric, swastikas, etc. Bragged about killing animals.  Everything here should of prevented him from purchasing a firearm per existing gun laws. However, mental health is rarely reported unless it is tied to a documented criminal record. At least 45 calls were made in reference to Cruz & household.
Multiple incidents of school shooter threat mishandled. “The sheriff’s office received a number of tips in 2016 and 2017 about Cruz’s threats to carry out a school shooting. The FBI learned that a YouTube user with the username “nikolas cruz” posted a message in September 2017 about becoming a school shooter, but the agency could not identify the user. In January 2018, someone contacted the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) tip line with a direct complaint that Cruz had made a death threat, but the complaint was not forwarded to the local FBI office.”

[Right & Left Wing label, probably Justified, possibly more left leaning]
1/23 Marshall County High School – Gabriel Ross Parker, had copies of the Communist Manifesto and Mein Kampf.  [Kid was some kind of disturbed.] Parker expressed that “he was an atheist and that his life had no purpose and other people’s lives also had no purpose.” Officers also stated that Parker indicated the shooting was an “experiment” to see how students and society would respond. << Atheism, and perverted scientific method.  Not really traits of the right-wing though…are they?

Social media needs spoiler flags

Facebook should add a Star Wars icon. So you can flag a post as Star Wars related. And you can only see posts flagged that way if you go into settings and enable it.

Have one for Game of Thrones too. Etc.

Amazon Prime is awesome….all these boxes…not as much.

I love Amazon. I make probably 70% of my purchases from Amazon. Their customer care is amazing, or Amazoning as I like to say. And I will even pay a couple bucks more to order from Amazon just for that peace of mind.

But one downside of being an Amazon fan is the flood of packaging. Now mind you, I prefer Amazon’s to almost everyone else. Their boxes are uniform and that actually makes them more easy to re-use, stack, etc.  But still, between the expense, the environmental impact, and just how much space they take up in the recycling bin….I’ve long thought there is a better way.

Recently, I saw that Amazon’s Kim Houchens is researching just that.  So Kim, here are a few ideas I have on the matter.

  • Chinese Takeout
  • Coke Cans and Lotto Tickets
  • LEGOS, everybody loves LEGOS


Chinese Takeout

The first idea, is to redesign boxes so that they are shaped like Chinese takeout containers – making them insertable and stackable.  Designed properly, stacked alternating every other one upside down, and one could fit nearly the same number of boxes on a shipping pallet.


Coke Cans and Lotto Tickets

The second idea, involves getting these packaging materials back to Amazon.  Drop-offs at the post office, the post office then delivering them when they have a full stack.  But how to encourage people to actually return them? I believe a combination of two ideas would be fairly successful.

  • A box deposit, say 25 cents for every returned box scanned in.
  • A lottery, where each scanned box counts as an entry.

Every day a chance to win a $10 Amazon gift card. Every week a chance to win a $100 gift card. Monthly $1,000 gift card winners too.  And one lucky entry a year wins’ Cyber Monday’s $1,000,000 Amazon gift card. Heck, teenagers might start riding their bicycles thru the neighborhood collecting Amazon boxes from people as an alternative to the decline in newspaper deliveries.


LEGOS, everybody loves LEGOS

Why not provide a second life to Amazon’s boxes.  One thing nice about Amazon is that they use a number of standard sized boxes.  Retooling the other sizes to be ratios of the “Prime” box would open up some really cool possibilities.

“Imagine if all the boxes were different colors.  Imagine if those boxes could be stacked and used like giant LEGO building blocks. Imagine pre-schools filled with Amazon building blocks.”

Imagine if you could take all of those boxes and easily convert them to building blocks? All it would really take is tape that had a Velcro feature. In fact, Amazon could even sell that separately. Apply to top and bottom of box and it becomes a stackable building block.  Amazon could even start coloring their boxes to increase appeal to children.

Granted, I believe Amazon would come up with something a little better than such Velcro dots. But you get the point.  Suddenly, all these boxes become giant building blocks.  We reduce the waste and environmental impact. And imagine the marketing…. imagine millions of kids growing up fondly remembering the building blocks with the “Smile” on them – you can’t buy that type of marketing.

So Kim Houchens, have at it…  =)


Yes, it’s been a while..

And I clearly need to update this blog.  I use it infrequently these days, however, I am going to try to use it to communicate ideas.

Old pics of yesterlife


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